Just to pass the time...

Started this as when I used to get back from work, I was usually so hyped I couldn't sleep for a couple of hours. Now just sort of carried it on for the fun, I try to make it funny, if it isn't please don't hurt me... Anyway, try to enjoy :)

Wednesday, 1 July 2015

Serious, unanswered questions

How do Smurfs reproduce?

Smurfette was the latest addition to the Smurf family after being created by the evil wizard Gargamel and as the only female, I do not understand how the Smurf population came to be.

These are the sort of issues that I discuss with my friend Danny over Skype....

Unfortunately, Google did not have any decent answers to this question, and so we remain in the dark as to the answer of this nail-bitingly important issue.

I mean, do they reproduce asexually and just divide as bacteria would do? Or is it something like a scene out of the Gremlins and just add water and poof! You've got another batch of brand-spanking new Smurfs ready to roll. 

This is an issue that needs to be addressed. Unfortunately, I'm fairly certain that the original writer of "The Smurfs" died a while back....yeah, in 1992.

Yes. I know Smurfs are fictional character, but plot holes much?

Equally, think about Cinderella.

So, when the clock struck midnight, she had to dash away from her handsome Price Charming, etc, etc, and poof! Her lavish accessories all vanished, her staff became animals again, and she was left dressed in rags once more.

So why didn't the glass slipper disappear too???

Sorry if I just ruined that entire story for you, but you've got to admit, it is a perplexing thought.

It's similar to The Little Mermaid. She signed the goddamn contract, she could clearly write very well. So why didn't she just write down everything that was happening for her wonderful Prince Eric to read? It would have avoided the whole near-end-of-the-sea thing and saved a lot of hassle.

"Fish language," Danny said. "Maybe she could only write in fish language."

She could speak English pretty darn well after she got her voice back, don't ya think?

Disney. What are you doing?

You reach near-adulthood and suddenly you start seeing plot holes in all these things and poof! That's your childhood ruined.

How many times can I say "poof" in one article?

It's a good word, though. "Poof". Onomatopoeic. Now this can count towards my English revision.

So we're both tired and still talking over Skype and Danny says:

"There are three moths flying around my room. Moths are just ugly butterflies. D'ya think that when a caterpillar goes into a cocoon and comes out as a moth, it's disappointed?"

Well there's a thought....

I argued that surely a caterpillar knows what it is already, I mean there are different types of caterpillar for different types of moth and butterfly so they probably know what they're going to emerge from that chrysalis as before they go in.

But Danny is adamant that unless caterpillars can talk among themselves then they have no way of knowing what they will be when they break out of the cocoon, and seeing the plain brown papery wings, they are almost certain to be a bit annoyed.

I suggested that maybe caterpillars can talk. 

Who knows? Maybe caterpillars have their own language. It's no weirder a suggestion as fish language.

These types of conversations are the ones that are honestly worth living for.

These are the conversations that make me smile.